I Want To Lay the Very Best!

194 – Sparky Trips a Minefield

It was a beautiful day, and plenty of daylight left, so the beach was still absolutely heaving with bodies by the time they got there. The sound of tinny guitar music and laughter could be heard over the gentle roar of the waves and the occasional excited scream of a swimmer as they spotted the fins of a Water Pokémon gliding nearby or got buzzed by one of the many flying Pokémon. Just offshore, a giant banana boat of people got overturned with a chorus of excited wails from an errant hydro pump blast.

"Oof," Morgan had a cone of chips she'd picked up from the food vendors while they were hiring a beach umbrella. Unovians called them Kalosian Fries, but they were weird. Morgan, the weird Unovian, was carefully eating them, shading the cone with her hat's brim. "This is far too many people for me. We have to walk into that?"

"We do," Brandy smiled, "You can fly in later if you like once we find a spot to stake out near Maple. I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

"I'm not flying around in a Summer Dress," Morgan laughed. "I will handle it. Just don't leave me alone, okay? I enjoy attention, but I don't like things being out of my control. This is a very messy situation."

"Promise," Sparky tucked herself under Morgan's wing, "We got the bird's back. You're part of the team."

"So kind," Morgan smiled and passed her paper cone of chips to Sparky. "Here, you earned these."

"Aw, thanks!" Sparky beamed, picking at the snack.

Brandy gave Morgan a glare. Morgan put a finger up too her mouth and pleaded with her eyes for Brandy to keep her plan a secret. If she were doing this to Calcine, Brandy would have stepped up, but there's nothing a Bug Type loved more than a good prank, even if they were the victim. Brandy would let this one play out.

"Maple will have a spot near the ocean," Calcine said, "It makes sense for her team. They'd be happiest in the water."

"Yeah, her and her curiously small team of aggressively sexy ladies," Sparky said as she wiped her salty fingers on her fur. Messy pup. "I wonder who her third Pokémon is. Maybe she's got a Dewpider?"

A Bug Type who had a Water's knack for making ladies' hearts melt. Brandy imagined someone with dirty jokes that'd make her ears burn. She really, really hoped that wasn't it. It didn't feel right anyway.

"She's a Fighting Type at heart. She'll want one good for her team composition." Brandy said, "We saw Mahi fight Maple, and she's a bit of a mid-range brawler with her water moves and horn. Holly is a Marill and-"

"Awesome?" Sparky grinned as their feet crunched over the sand. "You should have seen her go through ladies at the club. She was like a sexy chainsaw massacre."

"I-" Brandy faltered. "Really don't want to imagine what that means."

"The screams." Sparky shivered. "The screams."

Calcine affectionately clipped her around the back of the head. "We haven't seen Holly fight, but a Marill will either be a lot of Soft Moves or some ranged support. Maple's missing ... well, me."

"Tall, handsome, and tough with a good butt?" Morgan said, "I agree, every team needs some of that."

"What about wet and feathery?"

They all turned to look at the new speaker, who'd just dropped right out of the sky. She looked a lot like Morgan. Tall and feathery, but instead of Morgan's classic black, she had white feathers with a blue stripe along her midriff. She wore a baggy pair of Alola pattern shorts and a puffy blue jacket that didn't match at all. Her feathers scruffily stuck out of her clothes in big tufts. Her eyes were just two black horizontal lines a bit thicker than a thumb, a little odd for eyes but cute in their own way.

Her hopeful smile, with its vivid orange lipstick, was feared across Galar's beaches. Brandy had been a victim of these menaces when she was younger; they couldn't be stopped once they found their prey.

"I'm not sure you're built for taking hits," Sparky said, looking up at the lanky bird. The bird woman bent at the hip, dropping until her nose almost touched Sparky's. "Uh, no offense?"

"Give us a chip, and all is forgiven." the woman smiled. "Wingull honor."

Sparky fed her a chip, which she snapped out of Sparky's fingers with a happy coo, then licked the salt off Sparky's fingers with absolutely zero shame.

"Give us another chip for a kiss?" the Wingull smiled, "I love the taste of you."

Sparky looked like she'd brought her fishing rod to the shore, and a massive bass had jumped out at her feet before she'd even finished putting the bait on the hook. "Sure?"

"Calcine," Brandy whispered, tugging at her hand. "You might want to step back?"

The Wingull cleared her throat, then raised her head and yelled. "ONE KISS! ONE CHIP!"

"Wha-" Sparky barely had time even to try to parse that before she was mobbed by a swarm of bird ladies, laying quick kisses all over Sparky's body and stealing chips from her cone in a mad feeding frenzy, white and blue feathers flying everywhere.

"Oh no you don't, she's mine!" Calcine declared and pushed into the throng, wrestling with all the Wingulls to try to pull Sparky out of the pile.

Morgan was cackling properly, full-on evil witch cackling. Her back arched and a wing over her mouth as she interspersed the cackles with suggestions. "Go for her tummy! It's especially kissable."

"Morgan! Morgan, you'll pa-ahahahahah-ay!" Sparky was a giggling mess amongst the ball of feathers, Wingull getting tossed left and right as Calcine tried to reach down and grab Sparky out of the ravenous mob. "Ladies, I love you, but I'm out of chips! I'm out!"

"There's salt in her fur!" one of the Wingull giggled, "Lick it all up."

Sparky's messiness came back to bite her. Poor Bug.

The sand was getting kicked up everywhere by their wings, and a few people were watching them with amusement from their beach towels or scurrying to hide their chip cones. Trust Morgan to make a spectacle the moment they got here. Well, Brandy was happy to let Morgan and Sparky duel with their pranks, but she wouldn't let the team appear to be chumps.

"Sparky, Thunder Wave."

A few crackles popped out of the pile, but Sparky was giggling too hard from the flurry of kisses to build up a charge properly. A few Wingulls bounced out of the mob with shocked gasps, but more joined the pile-on immediately.

"Calcine, Rapid Spin." They might as well try out a new combo while they have the chance. "Morgan Gust to help make a whirlwind, let's get them outta here!"

Morgan stopped her cackling and waved her wings back and forth, her sun dress fluttering as she built a vortex around Calcine. "She'll giggle herself to death if we don't stop this. Go for it Calcine!"

Calcine grabbed a Wingull and began to spin up on her heel, the wind trapped by her wings turning her into a living fan, bowling out Wingull across the beach. One or two skipped along the Ocean before they caught their wings and flitted off. It worked great! Unfortunately, the vortex wasn't just throwing up Wingull, it was also sucking up sand, and as soon as they released it was going to go everywhere.

"Tighten the cone!" someone called out over the whipping winds, "I'll handle it!"

"Morgan, pull it in," Brandy yelled. "We'll try to drift it over the ocean if it doesn't work."

The sand closed in, forming a thin sand tornado.

"Water Pulse!" the friendly voice yelled. Wait, Brandy knew that voice.

Water flowed from the ocean and poured into the vortex, wetting the sand together.

"Marina, Sheer Cold!" then, with a high-pitched snap, all the water and sand suddenly crackled with blue light and stopped in place.

A giant, sandy ice sculpture of a tornado now hung above the beach. Inside Calcine pressed a hand to the ice and melted their way out, one very dizzy Wingull under one arm and a Sparky covered in orange lipstick smacks under the other.

"I need a cigarette." Sparky groaned. "Calcine, blow smoke into my mouth."

"I'm going to melt this monstrosity we've made before people try to break bits off for the drinks and swallow sand," Calcine said as she put Sparky and a nauseous-looking Wingull down on the sand. "You two make up."

"Kiss me, and I'll be sick in your mouth." the Wingull groaned, holding a wing over her head.

"Fair. Hey Morgan, come kiss this Wingull!" Sparky yelled. "She says she loves your style."

If Morgan fell for that one, she deserved the revenge, gross as it was.

There was some clapping from the people around them and a fair bit of ogling of their swimsuits. Brandy was used to people looking at her; she'd always grown up with it, but now she knew it wasn't all friendly glances as well. She couldn't help but blush as she flexed an arm for them. Everyone loved a good show, especially when someone was posing at the end.

Brandy only wanted to impress one lady right now, though.

There was a Pokémon with her hand leaning on the giant ice spire. As Calcine melted it, some of the ice reformed to keep the whole thing stable, something she did so casually that she wasn't even looking at it. Not the only casual thing about her, the glittering blue dress she had on could have come from a fairytale ball, though a fairytale that ended with someone getting stepped on by long, slender legs.

Sparky had yet to volunteer, but it was only a matter of time.

She had a silvery corset laid over her dress, and Brandy's keen eyes could spot that there weren't any joints; it was all one smooth piece molded to her body. She was looking down at Brandy with amused, silvery eyes. Down, because not only did she look classy as hell, but she was incredibly tall. Taller even than Brandy, she towered over everyone with a long, graceful neck leading up to perfect cheekbones that gave her just that little extra edge in height.

"You must be Brandy," she said, her voice mellow and soft. Like she was picking something politely off a menu. "I've heard so much about you."

Up from her shoulder popped her trainer, long golden hair flowing behind her as she stood on something out of sight, hanging off the Pokémon's body.

"Hey there, my pretty Pappardelle." Maple grinned, "I thought I'd never get to see you. This is Marina. Isn't she ... cool?"

"Hah!" Sparky snorted on the ground. "Ice pun. Nice."

Brandy shook her head. She was more worried about how odd the pasta nicknames were getting. "Thanks for the save. We make a good team."

"We have excellent chemistry." Maple smirked, "Come on, I saved you a spot to plant your umbrella. I want to hear all about what you've been up to. You can't stay out of trouble for five seconds. I bet it's been wild."

Maple didn't know how right she was.